Making community

It can be hard to make new connections. Even in places like Parramatta, one of Australia’s most rapidly developing cities, known for its restaurants, theatres, giant sporting facilities and events that draw in big crowds.

That’s not Roberta Fassina’s world.

Roberta likes board games. When her local gaming group had a hiatus due to the COVID-19 pandemic, she lost an important part of her social world. Three years later, Roberta decided to revive the group as the Games Lovers Meet-up. Silent Monday nights at home were quickly replaced with the friendly chatter she’d so missed.

In her mid-60s and still working long hours at a taxing job, Roberta saves up her energy for Monday nights when she goes to the Parramatta RSL, bringing with her the latest games she’s bought from GameStop and looking forward to the games others will bring. The sight of the very young and the very old sitting together gaming at the RSL makes her laugh.

These are her people. Their counters and boards and Dungeons and Dragons (D&D) figurines spill over the tabletops as this eclectic community, crossing age and cultural divides, eats and talks and learns to play new games.

As someone into board gaming myself, I can see this group’s strength is that it provides not only the chance to play games but also build friendships. Most clubs run only one-off games, but Roberta encourages the playing of fantasy tabletop role playing games, such as D&D, over multiple weeks. This means players get the chance to finish intricate campaigns, while engaging in the kind of slow, imaginary building of alternate worlds that draws people like me to this space.

Roberta relishes the chance to hang out with those who are younger and different. ‘It’s really good for me to make contacts and connections with people I otherwise don’t interact with as much,’ she says. One gamer is a brilliant mathematician who paces between the tables while waiting for the game to begin, another is a young mother who brings her two children. Other gamers are new arrivals to Australia or the Greater Parramatta community and looking to make friends.

Sometimes the gamers aren’t the kind of people who like to talk but they enjoy being around people anyway.

One teenager is usually quiet and withdrawn. That boy’s father tells Roberta his son is autistic and grateful he can play without pressure to make conversation or answer lots of questions. The teenager is self-conscious about being different, but with his group he feels he belongs.

Everyone here does. ‘It's great, it’s actually what encourages me to keep going,’ Roberta says. ‘No matter how tired I get.’

This makes me think of being a teenager myself when I would have loved a community like this, where I could happily nerd out and not worry about being stared at if I were to turn up with my Lord of the Rings or Game of Thrones board games and all the other niche dorky things that are still close to my heart.

Roberta sees part of her role as being the person who maintains and facilitates connections. When managing these events Roberta is ‘on the ball for new people and others that struggle to join in’. Luckily though, everyone is always kind enough to help. Each table teams up with some of the newbies and explains how to play to each game.

One of the newer gamers sits next to Roberta. The young woman frowns eyeing the colour pieces that jeer at her. Roberta turns her attention to the owner of RISK and plays along to be taught the game, acting like she didn’t know anything to put the new player at ease.

Gamers aren’t the kind of people who get seen very much. It’s easy to pass them by, but Roberta knows they are there.

Walking into the Parramatta RSL it feels surprising to see a large group of people playing board games.

One group, a family with two kids, trickled in for a closer look, whether they were here to play with The Game Lovers or just join for dinner, Roberta didn’t know, but she hoped it was the former. These accidental interactions are part of the benefit of meeting at the RSL, Roberta says, ‘There's a lot of people that go there for dinner and come and look at what we do, and a couple of people say, “Oh, you know, we might start coming”.’

Life can get in the way of gaming, whether it’s work, school, university, or life in general. Even Roberta isn’t immune: her work out at Mascot wears her out that she can’t go play, though the group still finds ways to meet up. ‘No one said being an adult was easy,’ Roberta says. I’ve felt this pinch more than once and have had to cancel a night of board gaming with mates. Although, some regulars of Roberta’s group have had to take a break, the sense that they’ve created their own family here keeps them coming back.

Lucinda Davies is enrolled in the Master of Research program at Western Sydney University. Her writing interests are mainly in the fantasy genre. In her free time, Davies enjoys gaming. She lives in Western Sydney and believes projects like this that revolve around Western Sydney’s vast and diverse communities are important.

Parramatta Profiles is a writing and photographic series that profiles individuals across Parramatta communities. Drawing on art, music, religion, activism and sport, each snapshot captures life in this dynamic city. A collaboration between Powerhouse and the Writing and Society Research Centre, Western Sydney University, this project supports the development of student writers by providing an opportunity to work with professional editors and be published by Powerhouse online.